Juan With The Wind

I phoned home tonight to check in with the folks in P.E.I., to see how they were dealing with the aftermath of Hurricane Juan. Turns out that the western part of the Islandówhere my parents and most of my Island-resident siblings live, in Summersideówas untouched. However, Charlottetown, farther to the east, was hit harder, I was told, with some roofs blown off and boats in the harbour smashed. Not quite as bad as Halifax, it seems, which was the exact point of landfall for the storm.

Now they're saying Hurricane Kate is possibly up next. (I think I may have dated her once.)

Of course, even while poles were being blown down, the polls stayed open for the P.E.I. election. Voter turnout: more than 80%! Apparently some people actually had to vote in the dark. Guess that explains how they ended up re-electing a record third straight majority Tory government.

Some Guys Have All The Luck

Another interesting ad from the Craigslist. Normally I try not to be too judgmental when it comes to people's sexual kinks. Whatever turns you on (provided it doesn't hurt someone else...that is, unless they want it to hurt...but that's another subject). But there's something vaguely unhealthy about the kink in this ad. I mean, on the one hand I think, "fine, if all parties involved are into it, and that's what gets them off, knock yerselves out." But then...well, I'll let you decide.

Disabled man wanted by two women - 32 (Toronto)
Reply to: anon-16888408@craigslist.org
Sat Sep 27th

Able-bodied bisexual female couple would like to meet a good-looking man for friendship and sex, who is either paraplegic, an amputee, or uses crutches/braces. Drinks, non-penetrative fun, brunch?

Any Freudians out there care to take a crack at this one?

Talkiní TV Blues

I'm not what you might call an avid TV person. There aren't many programs that can rearrange my schedule. But tonight's TV line-up presents some tough choices:

- "Six Feet Under" on Showcase - The first season. I love this series!

- "Martin Scorsese presents The Blues" - First of a 7-part series on PBS.

- "Coyote Ugly"

What to do, what to do...

Steely Pandering

Since humourous lists seem to be so popular around here... well, here's another! I found this one on the Steely Dan web site while I was there today. Had to write some copy about their new album, so I was gathering info. It's actually a pretty funny web site.

So if it's funny lists you want, let's... Do It Again!
EXPRESSIONS TO AVOID DURING A RECORDING SESSION

[íCourse this one might be a little funnier for those of you who are musicians]

Muchos Blogias!

A big thank-you to the folks at Blogger Support for finding and fixing the problem with my blog template. Seems a '<' was being converted to an HTML character code at the end of my counter script.

A here I thought it might have been a loose gemsunsaddle obstructing my universal sprocket.

Strokes Of Genius

I don't know happened to my lovely blog. The whole right side is gone. It's like a blog stroke or something. I couldn't see anything abnormal in the template code, but I'll haver closer look "under the hood".

In the meantime, for your reading pleas-or, here are this year's winners in the Washington Post's Style Invitational [thanks Erwin]:

The Washington Post's Style Invitational once again asked readers to take any word from the dictionary, alter it by adding, subtracting, or changing one letter, and supply a new definition.

Here are this year's winners:

1. Intaxication: Euphoria at getting a tax refund, which lasts until you realize it was your money to start with.

2. Reintarnation: Coming back to life as a hillbilly.

3. Bozone (n.): The substance surrounding stupid people, which stops bright ideas from penetrating. The bozone layer, unfortunately, shows little sign of breaking down in the near future.

4. Foreploy: Any misrepresentation about yourself for the purpose of getting laid.

5. Cashtration (n.): The act of buying a house, which renders the subject financially impotent for an indefinite period.

6. Giraffiti: Vandalism spray-painted very, very high.

7. Sarchasm: The gulf between the author of sarcastic wit and the person who doesn't get it.

8. Inoculatte: To take coffee intravenously when you are running late.

9. Hipatitis: Terminal coolness.

10. Osteopornosis: A degenerate disease. (This one got extra credit.)

11. Karmageddon: It's like, when everybody is sending off all these really bad vibes, right? And then, like, the Earth explodes and it's like a serious bummer.

12. Decafalon (n.): The grueling event of getting through the day consuming only things that are good for you.

13. Glibido: All talk and no action.

14. Dopeler effect: The tendency of stupid ideas to seem smarter when they come at you rapidly.

15. Arachnoleptic fit (n.): The frantic dance performed just after you've accidentally walked through a spider web.

16. Beelzebug (n.): Satan in the form of a mosquito that gets into your bedroom at three in the morning and cannot be cast out.

17. Caterpallor (n.): The color you turn after finding half a grub in the fruit you're eating.

......And the Grand Winner is:

18. Ignoranus: A person who's both stupid and an asshole.

Resist!

Ticketmaster has come up with an oh-so-brilliant strategy to combat ticket scalping: becoming the biggest scalper on the block.

Wonderful.

"Superior apples just don't grow on trees."

Wow! A chance like this doesn't come around very often. Put on your creative thinking caps kids, because Agriculture Canada wants Canadians to name a new variety of apple.

Hmmm...
Pomme de Terror?
Juicy Newton?
Fantastico?

In Rotation Today

Wilco, Yankee Hotel Foxtrot
Steve Earle, Jerusalem
Bruce Springsteen, The Rising

Yes Comments

Comments are baaaaaaack!

Nailing My Files

I was wondering what the chances are that I would be one of the people targeted by the RIAA for file-sharing. (Leaving aside the fact that the RIAA is an American group, and I don't think they have jurisdiction beyond their own borders... do they?)

I do have more than 1,000 MP3s in my share folder. The vast majority of them, however, are rare or unreleased tracks, or "unofficial" live recordings. Still, does that make me a "node"?

But according to that article, the kinds of music files the RIAA's hard-drive bloodhound looks for include such songs as:

ï Bobby McFerrin, ìDonít Worry, Be Happyî
ï Thompson Twins, ìHold Me Nowî
ï Eagles, ìHotel Californiaî
ï George Michael, ìKissing A Foolî
ï Paula Abdul, ìKnocked Outî
ï Green Day, ìMinorityî
ï UB40, ìRed Red Wineî
ï Ludacris ìArea Codesî
ï Marvin Gaye, ìSexual Healingî
ï Avril Lavigne, ìComplicatedî

Okay, with the possible exception of Marvin's classic, I think I can breathe easier. Sometimes it pays to have good taste.

Warren, Peace

I'll join the blog chorus in wishing Warren Zevon an easy rest. Good stuff, Mr. Z. Thanks. What can you say at this point about a guy who faces his imminent death with humour and classóand releases a version of "Knockiní On Heaven's Door" as a single! I'll just let him have the last say:

"I've already led two lives. I got to be a wild, crazy, Jim Morrison quasi-rock star...and I got to be a sober dad for 18 years. I can't possibly complain."

No Comments

It appears my comments provider, YACCS, is down for maintenance. This from their web site:

Rate Your Music and YACCS are unavailable due to a server failure.

Estimated time for fix: September 8, 7PM EST

Update (September 3, 4:35 PM EST): It looks like the old server is still failing intermittently. I can't debug the problem (since the server is located across the country), so the quickest solution is to ship a new server to the colocation facility. I'm going to build a server tomorrow and ship it on Friday. It should arrive Monday, September 8 around 6PM EST and should be online around 7PM.

Again, I apologize for the downtime. Unfortunately, there is nothing I can do to speed things up; the process of ordering and shipping a server takes time, and yesterday was the first day since the outage that any stores were open.

The good news is that the new server is much better than the old one, so the site should be significantly faster/more responsive once it's running.

Thanks for your patience and understanding.

So I guess I'll sit tight and see if the service improves. In the mean time, if you want to leave a comment, you can always click my name at the bottom of the post and send me an email. Not quite as interactive and community-like, but it's all I can offer.

SITES FOR SORE EYES

[From WFMU]


BEATALLICA
www.beatallica.org
Publicity photos, fan art, and crazy Beatles tunes, done Metallica style.

BIG ALIEN CATS
www.bigaliencats.com/sight.htm
Ah, another clear example of the "too much time on hands" phenomenon.

BLACK DIAMOND: AN UNREAL NEAL DIAMOND EXPERIENCE
www.blackdiamondvocals.com/home.cfm
"It all started at eleven years old, when the two hundredth Caucasion [sic] lady leaned over the back of the church pew and said, "young man, you sound just like Neil Diamond". Unbeknownst to me, it was at that moment the Black Diamond show was born!"

BUILDINGS OF DISASTER
www.mossonline.com/asp/productshow.asp?prd_id=1027&pc_parent_id=151
Tasteless or commemorative? Only you can decide-but it will cost you $95.

MR. WONG'S SOUP'PARTMENTS
www.mrwong.de/myhouse/index.htm
The world's largest pixel-art virtual skyscraper, topping out in excess of 1000 meters and 331 virtual residents. Jesus, a karate class, Andre the Giant, and anti-IMF demonstrators are all virtual residents-and you can be too, with just a little bit of work.

ORIGINAL MULLET WIGS
www.mulletwigs.com/
"These fine-quality wigs cost only $19.99 each!" A small price to pay for irony.