Kickin' It

Now, this is why the Internet was invented. You've gotta try this, but you all have to encircle it and try it one at a time

"I Know Where Bruce Lee Lives" - The Ultra-Interactive Kung-Fu Remixer. "...allows visitors to design and record their own fight scenes using skop's special interactive Kung Fu re-mixer."

[courtesy of Sites For Sore Eyes]

Come Play...

The summer tourism season is a big business back home on P.E.I. But it looks like some potential summer visitors calling the Tourism Department's toll-free number discovered they were in for a hotter time than expected.

[Telephone rings. Line is picked up, and a woman answers with a breathy voice]
"Hi, my name's Anne. I've got red pigtails that hang down over my hot body in an ever-so-wonderful way. Would you like to come play on my...island?"

Dim Sum-mation

I had a very nice reunion with some former classmates from U of Windsor grad school on Sunday. I've been able to keep in touch with some people from those years, but others I've lost track of entirely. But a few weeks ago, I got a rare email from Min, who had come to Windsor from Beijing, telling me that our friend Janet was coming up from Windsor for the weekend, and would be staying with her and her husband Lui, who now live in north Toronto.

It had been over 10 years since Min and Janet and I had been in the Communications Studies program together, and other than a visit to Windsor probably 6 or 7 years ago when I popped in to visit Janet, and a chance encounter with Min and Lui at Pearson airport a couple of years ago, I hadn't seen either of them.

So we arranged to have dim sum on Sunday at a place in Scarborough that Min says is the best dim sum restaurant in the city. It must be, because even with the SARS scare, which has devastated many Chinese restaurants in the city, the place was still packed and there was a half-hour wait, which I'm told is way shorter than usual. And it was very good, and pretty cheap. I was stuffed. But I think I'll pass on the duck's feet next time.

Unfortunately a few of the other alumni who live in the area weren't able to make it. So it was just Janet and Min and Lui and me. Oh, and Sienna, Min and Lui's 2-year-old sweetheart of a daugther, who was a new addition since last time I saw them.

It was great catching up on what everyone had been up to. Both Janet and Min have carved out good careers for themselves. And Min's husband Lui is an amazing artistóa painter mostly, though he also sculpts. He had had a studio in Yorkeville, but now works out of their new house that they just moved into about a month ago. Apparently he sells a lot of his work to collectors here and in Europe. Check out his web page, and it's not hard to see why.

The portraits are amazing, but what I like about his work is the wonderful sense of humour and satire that some of them display. Check out this one and this one. Incredible!

And I loved this painting, which was hanging at the top of their stairs, just inside the door. But I think they're way out of my price range. Oh yeah.

What a talent, though. My hat's off to íim.

Snap, Crackle, Plunk

I made an interesting "archeological" find yesterday. I was playing my acoustic guitar and I decided it was time to change the strings. After looking through the stash of various musical accessories next to my amp, I realized the only strings I had on hand were for my electric guitar. But then I thought I might have left a set in my acoustic's guitar case. Upon opening the case, I didn't find any strings, but I did find a block of something wrapped in wax paper, which upon closer inspection turned out to be Rice Krispie squares!

Initially, I couldn't figure out what in the world would possess me to place a block of Rice Krispie squares in my guitar case. Where did they come from? How long had they been in there? I've been trying to think back to the last time I had the guitar out of the house, and I think it must have been at a party thrown by Greg and Heather's friend Gailóand that was late last summer!

hmmmm, I wonder if they're still fresh...

*cccccrrrrrrrrunch*

...uh, not very.

*Knock, knock* "Swab Shark!"

Hey everybody, it's a good old-fashioned blooding! Check your rights at the door.

Lunacy

I just had to pass this along... because, I, too, like tha mooooon.
[via Mike at Randomness Personified]

Ad Hawk?

Call me paranoid, but I think the Blog*Spot banner ad at the top of this page is talking about me.

I've noticed over the past week or so that the items being advertised in the banner seem to be triggered by the content of my blog posts.

Exhibit A: A few posts ago, I mentioned WilcoóNext day, the banner is advertising the Minus 5 CD "Down With Wilco" on Amazon.ca;
Exhibit B: I mentioned Neil YoungóBam, the banner is touting Neil Young CDs;
Exhibit C: In the recent post about the mayor and the Rolling Stones, I mentioned office furniture and Italian shoesóVoila! The banner is trying to sell you office furniture and Italian jewelry!

Now maybe this is old news to those of you who are more web-marketing savvy than I am, but I find it kind of unnerving

Okay, here's a test:
[Shhhhh, don't say anything. Just act normal, Don't look at the banner.]
[I said don't look at the banner!]

Okay, so, like, last Saturday night I went to the Rivoli to see the Silver Hearts play Tom Waits' Rain Dogs in its entirety, and in the same tracking order. It was a great show! If any band was made for that music, it's the Silver Hearts, who I believe I described in a post many moons ago as resembling less a band than members of a Tom Waits band camp. This was part of a series that will apparently be held every third Sunday of the month at the Riv, with different bands and combinations of artists tackling a complete album. Great idea!

But there also seems to be a competing series, which is along the same lines, but features a collection of various, less well-known local musicians playing classic albums. Tomorrow night (Thursday) at the Phoenix, they're going to present Fleetwood Mac's Rumours in its entirety.

So, to recap, that's Tom Waits and Fleetwood Mac. Yes, Tom Waits and Fleetwood Mac.

[all right, Banner, let's see what you come up with...]

Shine A Light

So, it's the Rolling Stones to Toronto's emotional rescue? Well, that says maybe.

Okay, I know this was the brainchild of local MP Dennis Mills, but I kind of like to imagine the decision-making process to have gone something like this instead:

The scene: a dark, rainy night in Toronto. Inside Metro City Hall, the office of Mayor Mel Lastman, where we find the diminutive former furniture salesman seated behind his enormous oak desk in a deluxe executive high-backed leather chair ($799.47 at Bad Boy Furniture). He is sitting as far back in the chair as possible, engulfed by its generously padded back and arms, his legs sticking straight out, barely reaching past the chair's edge.

The seal of the city is mounted on the wall behind and above him, with the gold-embossed motto: "Please Like Us."

Lastman's head is propped up on his right hand, his index finger on his temple, brow furrowed as he watches Toronto Police Chief Julian Fantino pacing a trench in the faux-Persian rug ($1200.99 at Bad Boy) in front of Lastman's desk.

"Mr. Mayor, we're at our wits' end," Chief Fantino says, his voice rising with exasperation. "This SARS thing has really hurt the city. Large conferences have been canceled. High-profile concerts have been canceled. Hollywood stars and film shoots are relocating elsewhere. The number-crunchers over at the Tourism Board are telling me that revenues for the city will be significantly down this summer. It's a mess Mr. Mayor. We've got to do something!"

Lastman flutters his hands toward the 10-foot-high windows. "But these people in Zurich and New York, and...and...wherever...just don't seem to understand! It's perfectly safe to come here. We haven't had a new case of SARS in over two months!"

"Well, it actually hasn't been that long, Mr. Mayor," Fantino says patiently, with a hint of fatigue, "but, yes, the disease does appear to be under control."

"Maybe I should go on CNN again, andó"

"óNO!" Fantino abruptly interrupts, lunging suddenly toward the mayor's desk, then recaptures his composure and straightens up. "Er, I mean, no Mr. Mayor, that's perhaps not the best idea at this time...uh, so soon after your last appearance. Wouldn't want people getting sick of you," he adds with a forced chuckle.

"No, we wouldn't want that," the mayor agrees solemnly. The room is quiet but for the dull thud of Irony hitting the hard-wood floor. Fantino's pupils dart to the corners of his eyes, in the direction of the sound, but his head remains stationary. He bites the inside of his mouth.

The mayor is silent for a moment as he ponders the options. Once again, the future of the city has fallen on his shoulders. His eyes wander over to the silver-framed photo of his wife Marilyn smiling at him from the far edge of his desk; over to the other side of the desk to the smaller, hand-made wood-framed photo of his illegitimate sons from an affair he had with a woman many years ago; on to Chief Fantino's shoes. Nice shoes, he thinks. Italian leather? Yeah, probably. Fantino. That's Italian, right? Yeah. Makes sense.

The mayor feels tired. It's his last term, having made the decision to retire, and his creative juices are drier than a... drier than a...oh, something that's usually pretty dry.

Lastman's eyebrows suddenly arch up toward his brillo-pad scrub of hair, which rushes to meet them with the zeal of a cult looking for new recruits. With his gaze still fixed on Fantino's shoes, he announces with a mixture of decisiveness and resignation:

"Well, in that case Chief, there's only one thing we can do."

He raises his head and locks eyes with Fantino. The Chief nods knowingly.

Fantino moves toward the window, where an object about the size of a bread box sits chest-high atop a brass pedestal. It's covered by a black, leather hood emblazoned with the words "For Official Use Only". The Chief pulls off the cover, revealing what looks like a search lamp, and swivels it to point out the window. He flips a switch and a beam of light slices out into the night, painting the dark, rainy sky with a startling imageóa sign to all in the city that help is on the way. And a beacon to alert the ones who alone can help the city in its hour of need, that their assistance is required.

...This image.

The city is saved.

Outta Site

Hey, my friend (and former bandmate) Heather suddenly has a web page!

The things you learn from a person's bio. Heather, I didn't know you knew Joey Ramone!

Return Of The "Missing 6" (minus 2)

Neil Young fans rejoice!

From Billboard.com:
The four remaining Neil Young studio albums that have never been issued on CD will finally be unveiled in that format next month. "On the Beach," "American Stars 'N Bars," "Hawks & Doves," and "Re.ac.tor" will be released June 24 via Reprise. The albums, which have been out of print in any form for years and heavily bootlegged, have been digitally remastered but do not include any bonus tracks.

To which I give a resounding WOO!

Yet, a tempered WOO!, because:

1) That's only four of the "Missing 6". (Read more here.) Only the bona fide studio albums. What about the live album Time Fades Away, Neil? Frankly, I can live without Hawks & Doves and Re.ac.tor, though they have their moments, and Journey Through The Past is just kind of a soundtrack mish-mash, but TFA is a sentimental favourite, and a bit of a diamond in the rough among Neil fans. Of course, On The Beach is a minor classic, so it'll be great to have that and American Stars 'N Bars on CD finally.

2) While it's great that they're getting remastered (word is that Neil has held off re-releasing these on CD for so long because he was never happy with the state of analogue-to-digital transfer technology, and didn't want to re-release these in what he considers inferior sound quality. My guess is that the technology used for the recent Rolling Stones ABKCO reissues is what finally convinced him) ... but no bonus tracks??!! Ah, c'mon Neil! You've got so much stuff in the vaults, surely you can spare three or four rarities or pertinent live tracks for these re-releases.

Still, a big WOO! Far be it for me to look a gift (crazy) horse in the mouth.

Pseudo Simian-ulation

Well, this is very disappointing, isn't it. Personally, I was expecting better from Rowan. And let's face it, Elmo has never been a team player.

But it was hardly a fair experiment, was it? It certainly wasn't replicated properly. There was not an infinite number of monkeys (only sixóand I may not be up on this new math, but I can tell you that six is very frickiní far from infinity), nor was there an infinite number of typewriters (just one computer). And they were given only a month! You show me a writer (with amnesia) who can reproduce the complete works of Shakespeare in a month, and I'll be a monkey's uncle.

IT'S NOT FAIR! IT'S NOT FAIR! IT'S NOT FAIR!... [pounds stick against the ground over and over, and then, in complete rage, tosses it high into the air, where it revolves end-over-end, all slow-motion like, before transforming into the internatioal space station.]

... ooh, that was cool.

Couldn't You Just...

Okay, but can anyone name the tune? [Hint: click on the little asterisk]

Fountains Soon To Flow

Wooo! News from power pop wonderboys Fountains Of Wayne that their new album Welcome Interstate Managers will be released on June 10th, followed by a tour in July. So far only US dates, but check out the first one: July 3rd in Milwaukee...with Wilco! Man, now that's a double bill!

So the Fountains may not be flowing yet, but if you go to the band's web site, you can hear a stream (heh) of the new single, "Stacy's Mom". It rocks.

Can't help wondering what these guys will be like when they're 60.

What He Said

My friend Howard is never stingy in giving me props, so it's my turn to return the favour. Please read the wonderful recent installment of his "Under The Umbrella" column at Umbrellamusic.com. Bravo Howard! Nice job.

Those words of wisdom from Mr. Lama also reminded me of a conversation I had with Howard over dinner a few weeks ago. We were discussing the Iraq war, and Howard brought up the following quote from Albert Einstein: "No problem can be solved from the same level of consciousness that created it."

Pretty smart feller, that Einstein.

And hey, look, here are some more quotes from Mr. Einstein!

"Tin soldiers and Nixon comin'..."

The front page of the New York Times on this day in 1970.

Interesting to read in the story that the National Guard initially claimed there was a sniper firing at them from a rooftop. Convenient things, those snipers. Always good to have one in your pocket in case you have to use deadly force against unarmed people. Like when that tank fired at the hotel full of journalists in Baghdad. Or like those unruly crowds of ungrateful Iraqis.

And I wonder was it only a coincidence that last night while I was eating dinner in a small Mexican restaurant in the Annex, CSNY's "Ohio" was playing over the sound system.